New Years Resolutions

Okay so it is not the first of the year, but it is close enough. Closer to the front of the year than the back right?

Anyway, I had an awesome year last year. Going from being terrified to ride to riding my own pony bare back in a halter and lead. I also got out on the trail and actually had some pretty big spooks, ones that almost dismounted me actually. But we handled them and it didn't stop me from riding. Also learned to drive, a solid beginner, but still I am a driver. In fact there is only one goal that I did not meet last year, canter. It was not for lack of trying either. We almost got there but then had those lameness issues.

So for the new year I have some more practical goals.
1) Ride at least 3 times a week. For Corrie and for me. She is going to be 12 this year. For her own health I need to keep her moving. I also need to keep riding her. I love to ride as you all know but it is the getting out there and doing it sometimes, especially when it is blustery outside and I am trying to accomplish other things in my life. Even still this is an important goal to me.

2) That damn canter. Oh yeah, 2011 is the year to canter. I am going to do this barring any physical issues on Corrie's apart. There is no reason that I should not be back to cantering again.

3) Get that balance back baby! Okay, so this should before the canter phase but I really want to work on my balance. I have lost a lot of balance over the years but I want it back damn it! Riding Corrie bare back is one way, using a halter is my way of being kind to mouth. I am not know to use the reins for balance at all, but even still, don't want to start jerking on her poor mouth. Am also taking classes at the YMCA. These are helping a lot with my balance and general core strength. So this is more a feel and hard to define as a goal, but I think I will see improvements as they are made.

4) Rhythm. Some where over the years my rhythm has suffered too. Not just in keeping it but damn if I can get my correct diagonal without looking. How embarrassing it that at this stage of the game! I have noticed riding that I don't have that natural flow the way I used to with the gaits, the ones that comes from being in complete sync with the horse. Another one that will be hard to define, but I think once I can start keeping a track of the foot falls and maintaining a steady rhythm I will count this one as a complete. Or at least it will be time to set a new goal for rhythm.

5) Drive independently in my own space. Meaning in my own yard or in my little area around home. I want to harness and drive Corrie on my own. I had difficulties with this last year. I could do it at Sensai's but after a good spook that left me a little shaken in my skills I got nervous and didn't want to try.

6) Go on a group trail ride. I will have to bum a ride with someone but I hope that I can find some local people to go on a trail ride with and head out with them at least once this summer.

7) Not really a goal for me or for Corrie, but I would really like to get my city slicker friend up on Corrie. Why? because I want to share this thing that is so important to me with him. It is a totally selfish goal, but I hope I can pull it off.

Not sure these are the best goals this year. Little vague for my liking and so I might tweak them over the next few weeks. Still a good place to start, like seeing her at least three times a week. Of course the next time I have scheduled to see her is tomorrow morning and we are expecting a blizzard tonight. Guess I am just going to have see how that goes. If I can get out of the drive way though I will be at the barn!

Review: Of ME!

I just can not believe that I can just ride a horse with no fear, well, only a little fear. I mean it is in an arena and I still have issues but it is a long way from sitting in front of the tv playing a game video about riding. I think back to months ago: the fall, the recovery, getting back on a horse, taking lessons, driving, riding, it seems like such a long way. I never really thought I would actually be comfortable on a horse again. So now that it is June, it just seems like a good time to look back and see how my goals for this year are going.

Goals for 2010:
1) Start riding my own horse.
*well if Corrie is to by my horse then I can check this one off, but maybe I should wait until she is actually mine.
2) Ride my own horse walk/ trot/ canter.
*walk and trot are solid and I think I am going to wait for winter for the canter. I really am trying to get outside.
3) Start working with Kinsey on Training level dressage work.
*sadly this one will never be met, but if exchange Corrie for Kinsey, I am on my way.
4) Take a few lessons from a dressage trainer.
*gee when I wrote this I don't think that I even was thinking about taking driving lessons. I would still like to have a dressage trainer out sometime before the end of the year but I am really learning a lot from R. I am even thinking of putting "dressage" on hold and think more about "just" riding.
5) Lose at least 4 lbs. a month. That is really low. I am actually hoping for 8lbs. 4 lbs a month and I will be half way through my weight loss by the end of the year, 8lbs and I will be done.
*I have really sucked on this one, sucked big time actually but that is why I am going back and looking at my goals, to remind myself of what I wanted to do this year.

I am adding a #6. I really want to go on at least one trail ride this year. At the time I said that I really had no idea how that was going to come about, but now I think it is actually possible. Woo Hoo.

As I read these goals they seem so simple yet I remember writing them and thinking that no way was I really going to be able to meet them. Now it actually does seem possible.

Rewards. . .

For yourself. Hey this is a tough road some of us are on. Some of us are not only dealing with the issues with the horse, but also weight, emotional, self esteem, and other personal issues. I sometimes think that the horse is just the symptom. We need to actually take time to acknowledge when we have done well. Something that we really don't do enough as adults is reward ourselves.

Trotting was a major accomplishment for me. I have not really ridden in 4 years. Before this year, Jan. or so, I have not even been on a horse in 2.5 years. I had a short stint, maybe 6 months, that I was riding then. Before that it has been 2 or 3 years. So getting up there after that fall and starting to really ride again was a big accomplishment.

So tonight I made a special dinner of hamburgers, spinch soufflé, and an apple dumpling. Now that is not an every day meal. I bought apple dumplings off of a student for a school fund raiser and Stoffer's spinch soufflé is one of my favorites. I thought it was the perfect time to fix them. It is was so good and I am so proud of myself that I really deserved it. This was a big triumph for me.

Rewards don't always have to be a meal. A new pair of breeches, a video or book you have really been wanting, a new bridle, or even halter. Heck even an extra 15 or 20 min with your horse works. Just something that is going to make you happy. They can be as little as a gold star in your planner, hey adults like to get gold stars. In Weight Watchers you get a star sticker for every 5 pounds. Just match it to the goal you accomplishment. Little rewards for little accomplishment and big rewards for big triumphs.

Ideally you should have a reward in mind for every goal. I'll have to think about that. If it turns out that I am able to get on Kinsey, I think I will get myself a new pair of breeches. I don't have a pair of summer breeches.

Now what?! Keep Moving Forward

Trotting was such a big demon for me. I am not even sure why now. Logically there are reasons, but when it came right down to it, I was not even nervous. Now two weeks before I was a little shaky when we got a fast walk. So what happened?

As I mentioned before, on the drive over, I all of a sudden remember that I have trotted a lot. I could feel the trot, the rhythm, and how my body feels at the trot. I knew this feeling, it was home. I also knew that I had control of this horse. R.'s horses are calm, reliable and well trained. In the arena ,on Drew, I really did not have anything to fear.

I think I did figure somethings out. Each new milestone is going to be overcome in a different way. My plan for progression is going to need to be adapted after each new milestone. And of course, "Keep moving forward," That is from Meet the Robinsons.


Yup, I think that keep moving forward pretty much sums it up. What is that next step to take to keep moving forward? I guess I can look at sending Kinsey off as the next step. Really there is nothing to overcome with that step. Once she is evaluated, I am sure there will be steps to take. Either to sell or get her riding.

I need to keep riding Drew, if Drew is sold that is going to be a problem. I need miles. I'll have to start all over with another horse. I wish I had the money to buy Drew, but he is out of my budget so that is basically out of the question. I have things I want to work on just because I feel I rode horribly, but I am rusty. It has been about 4 years since I was really riding so no matter the horse, I need to get myself coordinated again.

Another step is to step it up again with the weight loss and fitness goals. I really need to kick myself in the butt and get going again. I admit I have been slacking. Enough of that.

I thought I had it all figured out when I got on Bill. Visualization was the key. Well, it was the key for getting on Bill. I am seeing that each new milestone will be unique. I did not do as much actual visualization to trot as assessing the risk and remembering what it felt like, and realizing what the hold back was. I am sure that for what ever comes next, it will grow organically. I am going to page though Jane Savoie's book again. I know that there will be steps that will work better now than they would have before.

So I have some things to do. Get Kinsey over to R. (she is going on the 8th), keep riding Drew, and get busy on my fitness and weight loss goals. And Keep moving forward. . .

Part Two: Self evaluation

The second video in this mini series is about self evaluation.

I think she starts with a really great questions. What do you want to do with your horse? Or with horses in general? There are a lot of great activities that you can do without ever getting on your horse. Trick training, driving, petting and grooming, taking walks, miniature horse events such as jumping, and halter. There is a lot you can do without ever throwing a leg over the horse. For many of us, it is the act of riding that really gives us the most pleasure.

Even in riding, there are many choices of activities to do. Everything from pleasure riding down some country road to competitive trail riding, hopping over a few ground poles to eventing. Do you want to be a western pleasure star or ride a dressage test? It is important to have an idea of where you want to go before you start out.

After thinking about what you really want to do, it is next important to look at your own skills. I know for myself that at one time I could sit a horse very well. I know that I can again. I know in my mind what I can do, sometimes I need to remind my body.

Next in the video is about comfort zones. Good risks and bad risk, and how to take good risks. It does a good job of that, I'm just going to let you watch it.


As an aside you have to take a good look at the picture they chose for bad risks. I just wondered about the choice, a little odd if you ask me.

A few brief comments are made about horse choice at the very end. I think they really could have made a whole 2 minute video just about your horse. I really think that for many of us, our horse is a big part of the problem. I have read too many stories, myself included, where the rider decided to just ride the horse they had, even if that horse was not appropriate at the time.

When I got Abby I was planning on working with a riding instructor and then that fell through. I knew when I bought Abby that she may have been a little too much for me at the time, but I was confident that with some help that we could get her going well. Well so much for the best laid plans. I have read over and over again of others who are not sure where to go, so they just keep on with a horse that is not going to work, often without help.

We, as fearful riders, need to remember that it is okay to ask for help. Being careful of who we ask though.

Next, the final video.

Really? Its Wednesday?

Well it is for very happy reasons that I have not blogged in almost a week. I have gained so much energy that I am actually doing things! Part of this is because of the vit. D, and part of it is because of the weight loss. I guess part is also just the out look I take on life now.

Well to some things up, I did lose 2 pounds last week, grand total is 15 lbs! I met my other goals too. So that made me feel so much better.

I have new goals:
1) lost 2 more pounds.
2) start How to Get Along with Difficult People. I am a people pleaser and I am trying to be more assertive. I find it hard to stand up for my rights and not let others control me. So hopefully I will get some tips.
3) ground drive Ike 4 times this week. It is cold out there darn it, but I am trying.
4) come up with some ideas to help poor Kinsey. She is a tormented soul.

Well I have been looking into what to do with Kinsey. I have made a very half heart attempt to sell her by putting up a Craig's List ad. I didn't even put on a picture so I bet that is not going to go any where. Someone would have to really be the right person.

I have been looking into ulcers. She fits the bill of a horse that would be prone to them. Stalled a lot, under stress, recently moved, and what not. Instead of having her scoped I am just going to go ahead a treat her. It ends up being much cheaper, and won't hurt her.

I am also lo0king into some more way out there alternatives. As I learn more about them I'll post. They include simple things and some really weird, but doesn't hurt the horse things. She is just a very distraught horse right now. Her eyes tell of a horse that really wants help. Her actions say, I'm not okay right now. In a month she is coming home and I hope a lot of healing can start then.

I went out to see her and play around on the ground with her the other day. After getting the ants out of her pants we had a long talk. She is stressed, confused, and leery of the arena now. I told her she was for sale, but only if the right person came along and I explained why. Am I wacked out? I don't know but I really think she did understand some and think she had things to tell me too.

Monday Morning Goals

Monday seems like a good as time as any to set goals for the week. I am so afraid to post goals that I won't meet them, but I'll be brave this week and see how it goes. If it goes well I'll post them on Mondays.

1) Lose 1 -2 lbs.
2) Along those lines, do the body test on Wii fit and exercise every day for at least 30 min.
3) Read That Winning Feeling by Jane Savoie for at least 20 min at night. Over all goal to finish book by the end of the month.
4) See Kinsey 3 times this week. I have a hard time getting out there because she is so far away, which make getting anything done with her difficult.

I think that a good number of goals for this week.

I am thinking of starting another blog for weight loss. It is all consuming of my mind right now as I am getting started and yet at the same time it is pivotal to being more comfortable on a horse.

Happy New Years

It's that time, isn't it? That time when we look back for a moment before we jump into making plans for the future year. I tend to just let December 31 flow into January 1 without much notice. No staying up until midnight and then sleeping until noon. Just a quiet reflection by myself.

After reading several blogs and what those people had accomplished in the last year I started to feel sorry for myself. what did I really do this past year? I did not write down plans for this year, mostly I was just hoping to make it through another year. Then I stopped and thought for a moment. I did have things I accomplished this year.

1) Start a weight loss program. I started Weight Watchers and I really find it one of the best ways to loss weight. Mostly because it is not a diet, but a new way to eat that takes in individual preferences into account.

2) Not only did I start, but I actually lost 10 lbs!

3) Start riding again. I actually did get on a horse in the past year. I came off and broke my wrist, but let's not dwell on the negative. I also found a horse that I really think I can ride and may have a buyer for Abby.

Okay there are other more personal goals I met, but those two are the ones that are most important here. Two goals is not that bad, especially for not having formally made any. Next year though I think it would be fun to look back and see what I have done.

Goals for 2010:
1) Start riding my own horse.

2) Ride my own horse walk/ trot/ canter.

3) Start working with Kinsey on Training level dressage work.

4) Take a few lessons from a dressage trainer.

5) Lose at least 4 lbs. a month. That is really low. I am actually hoping for 8lbs. 4 lbs a month and I will be half way through my weight loss by the end of the year, 8lbs and I will be done.

I am sure that I will add to that list, but it is a good start.