A Blink of an Eye

My heart is still aching for the loss of Madison, Ike, and Sophie. Rocky is still calling for his friends. Rocky and Madison were born a month apart on the same farm. They both traveled to me together when they were 4/5 months old. They have never been apart for 9 years. But that is how life goes. In a blink of an eye things can change.

I found this quote in the past few days:

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. ~Kahlil Gibran

I realized that I am sad because those three did bring me such delight.

No more watching Rocky and Ike play fight. Oh yes, miniature stay much more playful that big horses. Ike and Rocky would chance each other, rear up and and bite at each other and then take off for the chase again. Madison and Sophie would join in on the racing all around the pasture. That is all over now.

Madison was very much a mama's girl and would often come running up to me if I were in the pasture. In fact all of them were very much pocket ponies. Ike would wait until I have him a scratch on his butt before he would go out to pasture or when he came in from the pasture. Sophie was always waiting for her ears to be itched.

It is all of those little things that I think I miss the most: Listening to the call each other or for Sophie's bray or watching them graze in the pasture. Playing with them or taking photos of them or grooming them for photos, I miss those things.

On the farm it just seems like something is missing, a huge something is missing. I can not even begin to telling what a hole in the place those little guys left, not to mention the hole in my heart. But if I had never had them, so many delightful moments would never have happened.

Corrie out with the herd

PICTURES!

Corrie was really cute today. I thought she would be totally trying to be alpha mare. Instead she is acting like the new kid at school. If I got out to the pasture she is right there with me. Otherwise she looks a little lost. I think she wants to make friends, especially with Ike and Rocky ( she is in heat). It will be interesting to see how she fits into the herd.

I want Corrie to become comfortable with the pasture areas as that is where I will ride and drive her at first. I already did some ground work out there with her and she was fairly focused. She looked around, but mainly stayed with her attention on me.

Then she went out with Ike, Sophie, and Madison.









But she has to wear a grazing muzzle and the flies are awful so she wears a fly mask too. Looks like she is into bondage or something doesn't it?





She had a good roll.









And looks at how much weight she has lost! Looks pretty good huh?!



Pretty good second day I'd say.

One important step: Find a trainer

*WARNING* This is a long post.
In Jillian Micheal's book on weight loss she says that you need a support base of: a partner in crime, a mentor, and a fan. Same can apply to any behavioral change your trying to make. This post is about the mentor. It has been something I have wanted to blog about for awhile. I think that getting a trainer is the second most important thing I did to start the journey of getting over fear, yet it took me forever to do it. The first was to change my mindset to be more positive. After that I think finding a trainer I could work with has been priceless. It may be costing me a pretty penny, but I am riding again.

Sensei was not the first trainer I tried though.

I did find one great trainer a few years ago, but she had some issues of her own to deal with. So while it was great in lessons the rest of the time it was like dealing with a time bomb. She did teach me so much about getting a better seat. She also gave me lot of back handed complements. Like telling me that while other people would say I was too heavy to ride, she would work with me because she though I rode well. Or that I shouldn't worry about my large calves because that was the way I was and even though most people want thin calves, I would never have them but that was okay. Well I never was upset about the size of my calves until after that conversation. I stayed with her for as long as I could because she knew her stuff about biomechanics and was helping in that area so much. Finally it was too much though.

I left her just after I bought Abby. I actually would have never bought Abby if I had known I would lose my trainer. At that point though, I sort of thought I was well on my way and could handle Abby on my own. Besides she had ingrained it in my head that I was so heavy no other trainer would work with me. I was terrified of looking for another one. FYI I am what they call painfully shy.

So with the idea that nobody would work with me on their horse and having no way get my horse to someone or a place to have someone work with me at my place I was stalled for a few years.

During that time I was searching for someone to teach me to drive. I could not find anyone. I would ask around, talk to people who did drive, and nobody in my area taught driving. Or at least that is what I thought. Now just before I bought Kinsey I had gone to look at a very short and ornery Haflinger. I also did a little research about the breed. Wading through the mire of information on the net, I found Sensei. I did not call him then. *kicks self in butt*

Getting the boat load of trouble called Kinsey, I had about given up the idea of riding all together. Horses will be part of my life though, and I wanted to give driving another chance. So finally I did something smart. I called Sensei. Shyness almost won over and if I were not so desperate it really may have won, but I picked up the phone and called.

For driving lesson mind you, nothing else. I was NOT going to take riding lesson from a western guy even if he would let me ride his little horses, something that I highly doubted anyway. Well you know the rest of the story from there. I started driving and then starting sitting on a horse. Finally riding, now I have Corrie. Just goes to show that you can definitely get help from outside your chosen discipline.

If it were not for Sensei I would not be so happy riding again. I would be sitting with two horses I could not do anything with and missing out on riding for yet another summer. Getting a trainer was pivotal.

For the past three years I have been wanting to ride. I have been making little attempts at riding. I have been working, sort of, with my horses. Nothing came to pass because I needed that outside pair of eyes to help me get to my goal. Okay another true confession, I have ADD.

Look a pretty little pony:



See?



I get distracted by this idea and the next. I forget where I am going and end up at the start again. I have done this over and over again. That is one HUGE help that Sensei has given me. When I go out to the barn with some crazy idea, he takes me by the shoulders and turns me back to the goal.

Oh yeah a big pretty pony that I can ride and drive. I remember where I am going now.


That is something that a good trainer should be able to do. Help you find your goals and then stick to the path that takes you there. Weekly I would hear questions about getting my shafts for my cart, ground driving Ike, selling Abby and Kinsey, and other things I had to do to get on the right path for me.

Some of those decisions were really hard to make, like selling Kinsey and Abby. It about tore my heart. I really needed that objective person to help me move on from that point where I had horses that I could not use and were not suited for me at all to finding them good homes so that I could move on to a horse that is much more suited for me. It really has been very liberating.

Not any trainer could have or would helped me through all that. Not every trainer is suited to every student. I told you about one nightmare trainer that was actually good at training, but not as general person. Several years before her I hired a British guy who scammed me out of a lot of money. He seemed knowledgeable about horses in the beginning, but later said some odd things. I would blame odd information on that the fact that he was British. He is actually partly to blame for my fear. Those are the only two trainers I tried to have help me but they really put a bad taste in my mouth about getting help. That doesn't mean though that their aren't great trainers out that that still would not have been right for me. Keep looking until you do find one that you can work with.

So I understand how hard it is to find a good trainer. It isn't easy. I was so gun shy before Sensei. I did not even trust Sensei for a few months. Driving he was knowledge about, but I was not so sure about the riding part. Turns out that he is incredibly knowledge about about horse and people. My first few ground driving lessons were pretty easy stuff. Once we got out in the cart, I think he knew that I just needed to be working with the horse to work through my fear. We did a lot of talking, joking, and teasing. Probably because I was so tense. It was over time that I started to trust him and the horse. So give yourself a few lesson to get to know each other.

It is vitally important to trust your trainer. If you don't feel you can trust him, find one that you can. Especially if you are overcoming fear. You are hiring this person to help you work though some truly scary emotions. A lesson for a person overcoming a fear is very different than a learning to ride/drive lesson. Sensei did not push anything on me, unlike a normal lesson where a good trainer should be pushing you. Or maybe I should say that he was much more subtle about it. He is always waiting for me to make the first move, yet at the same time introducing me to new situations. I was nervous at times but trusted he wouldn't put me in a situation I couldn't handle.

As I get more confident he pushes more, but again that is how it should be. He puts little challenges out there for me. Both to work through on my own with Corrie and in lessons. He still realizes I have issues though. Now that I am feeling more confident, it does not mean that I don't still have fear. I think he realizes that more than I do, he has worked with a lot of people with fear issues. I sometimes think I can go out and do try something new and he will tell me to wait a bit more. Or more often shake his head when I tell him what I did and then tell me to wait a bit.

Trainers are there to be objective and sometime give you a reality check. You need to trust this person. And they need to be knowledgeable enough to be worthy of that trust, again, especially if you have fear issues.

Oh but don't think that I am saying you shouldn't question this person. I think Sensei would be very disappointed in me if I didn't question him to some extent. I want to know why. I don't just assume that he knows what he is talking about, likewise he asks me to explain why I do what I do. I think it is a huge red flag when a trainer doesn't like to be questioned or can't tell you why they are doing something. I am getting better about asking question if I don't understand.

And this maybe one reason that I really like Sensei. He does question me about what I do. Everything I do and rarely excepts an answer of "I don't know." At least not without a follow up lecture as to why it should or should not be done. If I can justify myself, even if it is different than how he does it, it's all good. I am sure that there are some that that would drive them batty.

Which is why you need to find a trainer that works for you. One that you can get along with. Your trainer maybe completely different than mine, but as long as she is knowledgeable, trustworthy, objective, and someone you can work with to meet your goals your on the right path. Just try to find someone and don't give up if the first one doesn't work.

I really wanted to share this because in my journey finding the right trainer has been vital to my success and will continue to be. I did not realize how important that one choice was going to be. Sensei is still going to be there through a whole lot more with me. Getting so I can drive Corrie on my own, bringing her home and driving her around here, going for a trail ride, cantering, and building a good solid relationship with Corrie so that I am not fearful to do all the above things. I know that my journey is far from over but I have a mentor for this journey.

What a wonderful sucky day

Oh I am smiling as I write that, but at the same time my heart is breaking.

I had Abby in the round pen yesterday. She walked, trotted, cantered for me. She stopped, did inside turns in and in general just did everything I asked. Then I took her into the arena and again, followed me around, turned on the fore hand, turned on her hind quarters, back and followed me. She just did everything I asked. She was wonderful.

Damn it!

It makes it hard to keep her up for sale, but as I tried to gazed over her back, loved on her and almost got my foot stepped on, I know she it too big for me. Yet I really want to ride her. Maybe one last time? Am I crazy to want to try and ride the horse that is associated with the only broken bone in my entire family?



Today I had an asthma attack when I went out so I didn't do as much. I got the video. I also got a really low offer on Abby. Trade for a saddle. I honestly would like a western saddle. I honestly am not sure I want trade Abby for one. I think she is worth much more than that, but at the same time the woman sounded like a good match for Abby and the longer I keep her the longer I have to pay board on her.

* * *
Well all make mistakes, and there is a price to pay for those mistakes. Mine is more ground work. Now don't get me wrong, I know how important ground work is. I am just getting sick to death of doing ground work, I have been doing it for years. Now that I am getting so much more confident I want to ride and I want to drive.

I messed Ike up. I had him try to pull too much weight too soon and now he is getting balky. So it is back to almost square one. We we'll call it square two. He is pulling the empty sled. I started adding light things to it as I walked around the yard, but not the barrel that he used to pull. Which means that when I get the shafts it may still be awhile before I actually get to drive while sitting in it.

We also are working on driving by scary things, like the blue recycling bin and the little flags in the yard to mark where we have phone lines. Ya know those things from Diggers Hotline. Well we were getting pretty good at the bin and Ike figure out how to handle the flags, he bit them and pulled them out. I guess that works.

Ickle Pickle

Where do we come up with the nick names for our horses?

Fike's Angle Fire was called Fire when I got him. . . ick! I was not going to call my gelding Angel, so that was out of the question. I was left with Fike. . ehh, shorted it to Ike. How I started calling him Pickle, I have NO idea. LOL. Ickle Pickle has stuck though, poor guy!

I am so excited that I set off the check to Sugar Rock Farm, the makers of my cart. I should get the new shafts in a few weeks! I am so anxious to drive him now. I am so much more confident to drive him. I just want to drive up and down my street and start to actually work a horse from some place other than the ground. Have goals for the horse and not just myself.

When I first got Ike he was 3. He bought him from a video. I ordered a little easy entry cart and my little harness and away we went. I drove him some and let him sit some because I was basically clueless. I think I have told this story before but one day I was driving him, nervous all the time about it too because I didn't know if I was doing it right or not, and Ike took off. I could steer but that was about it. As I am tooling around I am thinking, gee, I can't do a one rein stop. Then I headed him toward a fence. Nope, didn't look like we were going to stop. So we went out to the road, a quiet road. He ran, I was pulling but I was afraid of pulling his jaw off, so we ran. I took him to a grassy area and ran. Eventually he slowed and I got control back. It was a trip and I realized I needed to learn a few things.

It took me all this time to actually find a trainer to teach me to drive. Already I know that I could have brought him back under control by making a big circle. Also once he was under control I should have kicked him back up into a canter, made him work. I have learned so much more and I know the next time I step in that cart behind him I will be so much more prepared.

And so will Ike. We have been working around the yard with a "stone boat" (in quotes because it is really a plastic sled but works for a mini). I haul a barrel around. We also take out the garbage and bring in the cans. We are learning to stand, to pull, to gee, and haw.

Yea, I am a gee and haw person. Just a farm girl at heart. I even want a little wagon and a team of minis. I want to drive to town and get the groceries. Wagons have lots of advantages over those beautiful little carts.

When those shafts come, R is going to come out and help me make sure that I have it all together right. Get Ike hitched up and maybe we'll even go for a trail drive. Woo Hoo. I had hardly wait. Seriously, I am going to be watching for the UPS man like a hawk now!

Sunday Stills~ Happy Mother's Day

Sunday Stills this week is brought to by the letter "B"
B is for blue barrel:Bark from a tree:B is for blaze:
And also for baby!

Rain Rain. . . comes our way.

I have to be honest. I have not been working with the horses this week. I have been cleaning the house. Then today when I could work the horses, it has been raining all day. It comes back to this balance thing. Sometimes my personal life has issues I have to deal with and sometimes its the horses. I would love to have the resources to devote to the horses all the time, but like most people, I don't.

Since I am being honest, I will be a little more. I was in a bad place for a few years, a really bad place. I was very depressed. My life got very out of whack. My career, my emotional and physical health, all took a hit. I had no control and just felt so alone. I know that I am not alone feeling alone. A lot of us feel that way. Isn't that sad? So many of use all feeling alone? Anyway. . .

I am still getting back on my feet, but the one thing I realized about 3 years ago is that horses are my therapy; they are my antidepressant. Unfortunately they are expensive therapy and are not covered by insurance.

I tried to do things the cheapest way possible. One of the things I did was "ride the horse you have." I really shouldn't have. When I fell off Abby, I fell so hard. Not just physically either. I was trying to make a positive change and landed flat on . . . well my wrist! It was good though, all I could think about was how to get back in the saddle. It really showed me where I was and what was important to me. Horses are the thing that give me bliss and allows the rest of my life to made sense.

I look forward to the days I get to ride or drive with such a longing. Then I return home and look at a pasture of horses. None of which can be used for one reason or another. Kinsey needs a saddle and maybe some training. I would like to drive Abby but that is another harness and wagon, besides the training she would need. I need a safe environment to ride either of this horse as of right now and I don't have that either. My cart needs shafts. Madison needs a harness that would fit her and training. Ike really needs a new harness, one that has breeching. Sophie need training, she may need a harness or she may be able to use Ike's.

"Inch by inch, life is a cinch. Yard by yard it is very hard." Sometime when I try to focus on all of these things and get great grandiose plans I need to remember this. Focus on a few small things and then I can move on.

Thanks to a very special person, I am getting support to get things in a little more order. Kinsey leaves tomorrow to go to R. I am really looking forward to just seeing what he says. She maybe my next riding horse or she may be on the market. She is a good horse either way. I just want her to to be used and not sit through her prime. Thanks to R I am not as self conscious about my weigh, so Ike is just waiting until I get shafts. I ordered them this week, my reward for slaving away getting 1/3 of the house in order. Then I will have a horse that I can do something with finally. I think I can make his harness work for now, I just can't go very far because of the breeching problem and the terrain around here.

So as the rain comes, it makes the earth muddy. From that mud grows beautiful flowers, wholesome food, and life. I'll wait to see what will grow from this rain.

Competely unhorse related

Blog related. . .

Does anyone else have this problem. . .

You look at the blogs on the left. Today for example Bitless Horse, since this is the latest one I am having this difficulty with. I see that she has a new post. But when I click on the link for the new post. It says there is no such page. Then if I click on the link for her actual blog, I get the previous post, not the new one. I don't know what the problem is. Sometimes, later on I will see the post that I was previously unable to see. Does this make sense? Has anyone else had this problem?

Ok, I called R and when he can he is going to pick up Kinsey. I have found the shafts I need for Ike's cart, I just need to send the guy the money. It is rainy out today and I was very upset to see my chickens running around followed by a FOX. I chased him off twice but I am not sure if he got anyone yet. Damn fox!

Driving Lesson #7

I didn't have a lesson last week because of Midwest Horse Fair. So I should have had a riding lesson, but since I missed my driving lesson I did that this week. Not that it matters all that much, but I wanted to drive.

Call me chicken, call me more interested in driving. I don't know for sure. I do know that driving is helping me more comfortable dealing with spooks. Really it does. It just tips my nerves up a notch, but not too much. If you remember from the video a few weeks back we need to move into the uncomfortable zone, but not so far in that we end up in the fear zone. For example, today I had to wait while R. did something outside the cart. Corrie wanted to back up. I felt that momentary nervousness because of a lack of control. I knew how to ask her to step forward. So I asked her. We had to do that a few time. She actually was fairly good, some issues, but R said I handled them well. It was little bit of nervousness, but that fact that I could it that helps me feel a little more in control.

I realized that is why I feel so afraid. I have that loss of control because I asked Abby to stop and she didn't. I don't know if I was not forceful enough, or she was just ignoring me or what. It is hard to think back to moments before I fell. I remember it all but analyzing exactly what when wrong is difficult. I do know remember feeling out of control.

R and I talked about Kinsey again. I swear I am starting to sound like Saturday morning breakfast with all my waffling. I think that maybe I should send her over to him for just a 2 week evaluation. He can get on her and see what she is really like and give me an honest evaluation of if she would be right for me or if I should sell her now. She is not a bad horse, she is actually a very good horse and probably has some hidden talent in there. But to be honest, I am not sure if she is still a good horse for me. If there is potential, then she can stay there for a little while, and she will be the next horse I start riding in lessons. If she just isn't going to be right for me, it is still early in the year and maybe I can find a nice home where she would be better used. If she is at R's then we have a round pen and a arena for people to try her in. The alternative is that she sit here for two years and becomes a 12 year old horse that has sat for two years and nobody wants. Honestly that is not fair to her or me. Meanwhile if the right horse did come around I could not get it because I have too many right now. Also working 3 horses a day, taking care of the house, working, and doing everything else that I have to do it really hard.

I will say that we have made some improvements. You can see in her picture, she is licking. Does a lot of thinking that one. (Ignore the rope around her neck, it is a long story and not very interesting) She is getting easier to catch, is doing really well with everything I am asking and I really enjoy working with her. It is just in the back of my mind I am thinking, "Is this a waste of time." Why put all the work into her when she is just not going to be a horse that I can ride when I could just take her to R. and find out. And when I could be putting that time into Ike or Madison. Ya know? To many horses not enough time.

After the lesson I came home and ground drove Ike. I had him pulling a little sled. We walked around and picked up branches and what not from around the yard so we had lots of "whoa" standing while I picked up sticks, scary sounds of dragging the sled across the driveway. All excellent stuff. He was nervous about the driveway, but after we went over it a few time he got much better. I have to order the shafts to fix my cart so I can actually drive whenever I want. That will be fun!

Relax in the Pasture

After reading some of the blogs ( seen on the right) I decided to just sit out with my horses. The barn can wait. I took Laura Crum's Going, Gone out in to the pasture along with a folding chair and just sat down.

The reactions from my horses was funny and not exactly what I expected. Kinsey treated me with the normal indifference, she seems no more or and maybe a little less upset that she normally does. Abby on the other hand was not sure what the heck to make of me. She looked up from her grazing, stared, and snorted. Walking around, giving me a large berth, she continued to snort and blow. Eventually she tired of watching me and went back to eating. Madison was the brave little girl, man I wish she was large enough to ride, she came up and sniffed. She wanted her scratched and searched me for treats. Ike was a little more nervous but eventually came over for a few scratches. Sophie would never come over and Dominique was nervous too, but he did stop by to sniff me.

I sat out there getting more and more engrossed in the mystery set out west surrounding the murder of a brother and sister. The story features horses as a central focus and it is so nice to read a story about horses where the author actually knows what she is talking about. No making love the back of a horse with the lover's heads on the horses flanks~ never figures out how that was possible. Anyway I will be a better review of the book when I am finished which I am sure will be in the next few days.

Abby and Kinsey spooking and came running around the field. With the minis out front, Abby was following up behind. They were headed straight for me. Abby, I don't think, still realized who I was. As I watched her massive chest and legs pounding the ground heading toward me I thought, "gee, I wonder if she'll stop." Of course she did. Stopped, and snorted, then continued on with her grazing.

In the pasture, the sun shining down, and my horse grazing around me I realized this was just about as perfect as it could get. It was a very nice way to pass a few hours.

Wordless Wednesday

Wordless Wednesday

Wordless Wednesday

Those cute things horses do!

I stopped out to see Kinsey today. I have not gotten out in the past two days so it was really needed. It was a very nice day, bright, if not sunny. The temperatures are in that comfortable range, well comfortable if you are used to the Midwest.

I walked in to the barn as the stalls were being cleaned. The crew at the barn is very friendly and always up for a good chat. We greeted each other cheerily. "Oh look who's little ears just pricked up." I looked over to Kisney's stalls. Her little ears were just pricked and look very happy to see me. Those few words, those warm eyes, those furry little pricked ears; it just warmed my heart.

For some reason Kinsey's purple plaid halter looks really nice on her red dun face. Why? I don't know, I know that red heads don't normally look good in purple but I think she is stunning. Anyway I put her purple halter on, and lead her out into the not sunny, but very bright, day. One of the people who work at the barn, I'll call her Fran, was coiling up hose. It doesn't lay flat on the ground, I am always so nervous that Kinsey is going to snag a toe on it and spook. I have her step across it so carefully, one step at a time. Linda Tellington~Jones would be proud.

Fran was in a talkative mood and we chatted about horses, showing, Kinsey's conformation, and various stuff like that. We chatted it up for at least 5 minutes. What was Kinsey doing during all this time. Standing there. Just standing like an ol' cow horse after working a herd. She was doing me quite proud.

As we talked I reached over and pet Kinsey. Then the most miraculous thing happened. Some of Kinsey's hair came off. I grabbed a little and tugged, it pulled out with ease. "Look at this," I spoke to Fran, "she's shedding, spring is coming!" It was just a second happy surprise.

Finally I pulled Kinsey away and we headed to the indoor. I let the girl lose and she took off like a rocket. I mean, as soon as she was lose she took off bucking and a farting. I am not normally into bathroom humor but bucking farting horses just make me laugh. I guess it is because they are just so full of themselves they explode. She ripped around the arena like nobody's business, doing her best Arab impersonation with her tail stuck straight up in the air. That was the third cute thing she did. I was just so happy to watch her run and buck.

I came home and ground drive Ike. We have been working on steering, whoa, and stand. Ike is broke to drive but has not done it in awhile so we are just reviewing the basics.

Ike has to stand. It is so very important that a driving horse stands when he is told to stand. Don't want your horse running off as you are getting in the cart! So here is Ike standing, next to a lot of hay, his dinner actually. I was so proud that he was able to do this with out much fuss. I'm not saying that he didn't need some reminding to not eat the hay, but all in all he stood like he should.

Really? Its Wednesday?

Well it is for very happy reasons that I have not blogged in almost a week. I have gained so much energy that I am actually doing things! Part of this is because of the vit. D, and part of it is because of the weight loss. I guess part is also just the out look I take on life now.

Well to some things up, I did lose 2 pounds last week, grand total is 15 lbs! I met my other goals too. So that made me feel so much better.

I have new goals:
1) lost 2 more pounds.
2) start How to Get Along with Difficult People. I am a people pleaser and I am trying to be more assertive. I find it hard to stand up for my rights and not let others control me. So hopefully I will get some tips.
3) ground drive Ike 4 times this week. It is cold out there darn it, but I am trying.
4) come up with some ideas to help poor Kinsey. She is a tormented soul.

Well I have been looking into what to do with Kinsey. I have made a very half heart attempt to sell her by putting up a Craig's List ad. I didn't even put on a picture so I bet that is not going to go any where. Someone would have to really be the right person.

I have been looking into ulcers. She fits the bill of a horse that would be prone to them. Stalled a lot, under stress, recently moved, and what not. Instead of having her scoped I am just going to go ahead a treat her. It ends up being much cheaper, and won't hurt her.

I am also lo0king into some more way out there alternatives. As I learn more about them I'll post. They include simple things and some really weird, but doesn't hurt the horse things. She is just a very distraught horse right now. Her eyes tell of a horse that really wants help. Her actions say, I'm not okay right now. In a month she is coming home and I hope a lot of healing can start then.

I went out to see her and play around on the ground with her the other day. After getting the ants out of her pants we had a long talk. She is stressed, confused, and leery of the arena now. I told her she was for sale, but only if the right person came along and I explained why. Am I wacked out? I don't know but I really think she did understand some and think she had things to tell me too.

Driving Lesson #1

I have a little miniature horse named Fike's Angel Fire. Sweet little guy, I call him Ike. I have had Ike for several years now and he is a great little man, but I have not been using him much. I drove him bit when I first got him, but he has sat for a few years now. Well as after getting so frustrated with my big horses I thought I would start driving the him again. Except I was never really taught how to drive properly, it is not just like riding only you sit behind.

When you drive you don' t have your seat or your legs, two of the main aides you use when riding. It requires more more reliance on voice, rein , and a whip. Also when driving your horse really needs to be well behaved. As my trainer said today, "Riding a horse you can kill yourself, when driving you can take out 10 other people as well." Making the point that if a horse is loose with a cart behind him, he is dangerous to anyone in the area.

Our first lessons will be on how to get Ike ready to drive, then we will move on to actually driving. I am not using Ike for the lessons but will work on these skills until my next lesson. Today I got to work with Bill. If you look on R&S Rolling Ranch site under the For Sale area you will see Bill. Go look, I'll wait. . . .

Isn't he cute? ( my trainer really hates "cute" )

It was really a trip though, I can't say I learned a lot of new information. I learned about Roger and how he likes things done and why. Which is just as important. I know a lot of these skills, but how they are applied to driving is a new thing. For example, he was explaning the importance of the outside rein. Well that is one of the staples of dressage. . . "inside leg to outside rein". So it is more connecting dots and apply old skills in a new way.

I'll let you know more as I move along.

Monday Goals

Okay craptastic weekend aside, here is the scoop from past week.

1) Lose 2 lbs. by drinking h2o and tracking my WW points. a I actually lost 3 and got my 5% star for losing 5% of my start weight!
2) Finish That Winning Feeling Very close.
3) Try some different exercises this week. a I actually got Wii Active. I started the 30 day challenege.
4) See Kinsey and ride CJ. I want to ride Kinsey next month. . . mostly so she'll be a little more fit and I will be a little more thin! a I obviously saw Kinsey but I did not mention that I did ride CJ and actually trotted a few steps. I am actually not very comfortable in a western saddle, but it was good.

New Goals:
1) lose 2 more lbs.
2) Finish That Winning Feeling
3) Keep up with the 30 day challenge
4) I am not sure whatto put here this week.
Okay so I am calmed down a little. Eventually I will be able to ride a horse like Kinsey. I was just really bummed that now I don't have a horse to get my confidence back on again. And that I have two horses that I can't ride; and a few other issues. I mean besides CJ but I hate to use him too much, not that I work him hard.

I am going to be taking some driving lessons. A local halflinger breeder gives driving lessons. That should be fun, and I can start driving my little guy.

I also got sick, and feel like total crap.